Godiva's Hymn

2019-02-16T02:02:09Z

138.51.253.60: /* Female Verse */

'''Godiva's Hymn''', named after [[Lady Godiva]], also sometimes called the ''Engineer's Hymn'', is a traditional song for the celebration of engineering. It has been associated with the US Army Corps of Engineers, and is widespread across numerous engineering faculties around North America.

The Hymn is usually sung to the tune of "The Battle Hymn of the Republic", and at Skule™ it is typically sang at every appearance of the Mighty [[Skule Cannon]], whereupon the Cannon is fired at the conclusion of the Hymn. After the Cannon firing, students at Skule™ usually break out into the [[Skule Yell]]. At Christmas time, the [[Lady Godiva Memorial Bnad]] has been known to sing the song to the tune of Good King Wenceslas.

While the Hymn has many verses, it is unusual for students to sing more than the typical 2-3 standard verses commemorating Lady Godiva, or, during [[F!rosh Week]], the additional verses poking fun at other faculties. Many old verses of the song, particularly the off-colour verses, have been deprecated and are rarely remembered, much less heard, on campus. During [[Godiva Week]] at Skule™, many [[Godiva's Crown]] competitors have been known to show off their mastery in memorizing obscure verses, and many have invented their own.

== Chorus ==
:We are, we are, we are, we are, we are the Engineers,
:We can, we can, we can, we can demolish forty beers.
:Drink rum, drink rum, drink rum, drink rum, so come along with us,
:For we don't give a damn for any damn man, who don't give a damn for us.

== Verses about Godiva ==
''The first verse is always sung first before the chorus, typically followed by the second. After that it's anyone's game!''

:Godiva was a lady who through Coventry did ride,
:To show to all the villagers her fine and lily-white hide.
:The most observant villager, an Engineer of course,
:Was the only one to notice that Godiva rode a horse.

:Said she, "I’ve come a long, long way, and I will go as far,
:With the man who takes me from this horse, and leads me to a bar."
:The men who took her from her steed, and led her to a beer,
:Were a bleary-eyed Surveyor and a drunken Engineer.

:Godiva woke next morning and she had an awful head,
:Decided to be sensible and spend the day in bed.
:The only ones to visit her and bring her lots of cheer,
:Were a broken-down Surveyor and a bloodshot Engineer.

:Godiva died and where she fell a bench marks the spot,
:In any Engineering text, its level can be got.
:And up in Heaven, every day Godiva craves for beer,
:But she'll have to wait until the gates let in the Engineers

:Godiva was a lady well-endowed, of that there was no doubt.
:She never wore a stitch of clothes, just wound her hair about.
:The first man who ever made her was an Engineer of course,
:But on just one drink, and Artsie fink once made Godiva's horse.

== Female Verse ==
:We are, we are, we are, we are the female Engineers,
:We can, we can, we can, we can demolish half as many beers.
:So cum, so cum, so cum, so cum, so cum all over us,
:For we don't give a damn about any damn man that can't get it up for us.

:A firehose by day and forty beers by night,
:An engineer may never sleep but still stay just as bright,
:And if you ever ask her how she keeps up her routine,
:She'll raise her trust can of Jolt, smile and say 'Caffeine!'

:A man sat in a tavern with a lovely looking lass
:And stared when for the nineteenth time she raised and drank her glass
:"You've out-drunk four strong men, and half the bar my dear"
:The maiden smiled sweetly, said "I'm an Engineer!"

:I happened once upon a maid whose eyes were full of fire,
:Her physical endowments would make your hands perspire,
:She shocked us when she told us that she never had been kissed,
:For her boyfriend was a worn-out Engineering Scientist.

:At the Arts Quad at our school there are many untruths told
:'bout how female engineers are frigid, strange, and cold,
:But truth be told men look for lady engineers of course,
:And sleep with girls who study friction, motion, stress and force.

== Version française ==
:Nous sommes, nous sommes, nous sommes, nous sommes les ingénieurs français
:Quand on a fini de boire la bière, on sort le Bourgelais
:On boit sans fin, on fait la fête et les filles nous adorent
:Rien de mieux que la langue française pour stimuler un corps.

== Politically Correct Verse ==
:We are, we are, we are, we are, we are the Engineers,
:We can, we can, we can, we fix anything with gears.
:We work real hard, we play real hard, so come along with us,
:For we don't give a damn for any damn man, who don't give a damn for us.

== Pubcrawl Verse ==
:We're lost, we're lost, we're lost, we're lost, we don't know where we are,
:We want, we want, we want, we want, we want to find a bar.
:Don't come, don't come, don't come, don't come, don't come along with us,
:For we don't know where the hell we are but fuck we're on a bus!

== Verses about Engineering and University ==
:Professors put demands on us, they say we have to tool,
:But all we want to do is sleep, we hate this fucking school.
:You can bitch or tell us off, even abuse us if you please,
:But we're all set to graduate, and all we need are C's!

:Venus is a statue made entirely of stone,
:There's not a fig leaf on her, she's as naked as a bone.
:On noticing her arms were gone, an Engineer discoursed,
:"The damn thing's busted concrete and it should be reinforced."

:An Engineer once came to class so drunk and very late,
:He stumbled through the lecture hall at an ever-diminishing rate.
:The only things that held him up and kept him on his course,
:Were the boundary condition and the electromotive force.

:A U. of T. Engineer once found the gates of Hell,
:Looked the devil in the eye and said, "You're looking well."
:Satan just returned the glare and said, "Why visit me?
:You've been through Hell already, since you went to U. of T.!"

== Verses about Disciplines ==
:A Comp and an Elec did battle outside Bahen hall,
:Students gathered round to watch the two great students brawl.
:The Elec spoke of flux and fields for a minute, two or three,
:But the Comp kept rambling on and on and on recursively!

:All Eng Sci types in second year are really in a plight,
:They're the masochistic ones, who haven't seen the light,
:After two more years they will all be just as brain dead,
:As any first year Civil Engineering cement head.

:I happened once upon a girl, who eyes were full of fire,
:Her physical endowments would have made yours hands perspire.
:"To my surprise she told me that she never had been kissed,
:Her boyfriend was a tired Engineering scientist.

== Verses about other faculties and artsies ==
:An Artsie and an Engineer once found a gallon can,
:Said the Artsie, “Match me drink for drink as long as you can stand.”
:They took three drinks, the Artsie fell, his face was turning green,
:But the Engineer drank on and said, "It's only gasoline"!

:An Artsie and an Engineer were stranded on a boat,
:One man above capacity, the poor thing would not float.
:The Engineer would flip a coin to settle the dispute,
:So he flipped it in the water and the Artsie gave pursuit.

:The Army and the Navy boys went out to have some fun,
:Down at the local tavern where the fiery liquors run.
:But all they found were empties for the Engineers had come,
:And traded all their instruments for gallon jugs of rum.

:Professors put demands on us, they say we have to tool,
:But all we want to do is sleep, we hate this fucking school.
:You can bitch or tell us off, even abuse us if you please,
:But we're all set to graduate and all we need are C's.

:A wide-eyed Artsie Chemist and a Chemical Engineer,
:Were formulating molecule equations over beer.
:Each drank a glass of water, but the Artsie hit the floor,
:For what he thought was H2O was H2SO4.

:On reading Karma Sutra, a guy learned position nine
:For proving masculinity, it truly was divine.
:But then one day the girl rebelled and threw him on his rear,
:For he was a feeble artsie and she was an Engineer.

:So now you’ve heard our story and you know we are the Engineers,
:And when we all shall graduate, we’ll all have great careers.
:An Engineer’s starting wage can pull in 60 G’s,
:While an Artsie with a PHD can work at Mickey D’s.

== Verses from Skule history ==
:The [[Jerry P. Potts trophy]] for the [[chariot race]] at Skule™
:Had been stolen from the fold but Mario said, "Dis ain't cool".
:So Mario recovered it, returned it to the throngs,
:On the condition that the Skule™ mates sing his praises in their song.

:Joe E. Skule™'s 100 but he has a heart of gold;
:He gave the meds his [[Skulehouse]] when it was 94 years old.
:The meds were very grateful, but they have problems with precision,
:For they use those T-squares and dividers when making their incisions.

:For 50 years the engineers at Queens' have had our pole,
:From Varsity they took it, and their F!rosh week was its role;
:But 28 of our own went down, and with a cunning plan
:[[Queen's Grease Pole Liberation (2000)|We opened up an unlocked door and brought it home again]]!

== Naughty, suggestive, or verses in somewhat bad taste ==
<div class="censor">
:A maiden and an Engineer were sitting in the park,
:The Engineer was busy doing research after dark.
:His scientific method was a marvel to observe,
:While his right hand wrote the figures down, his left hand traced the curves.
</div>

<div class="censor">
:My father peddles opium, my mother's on the dole,
:My sister used to walk the streets but now she's on parole,
:My brother runs a restaurant with bedrooms in the rear,
:But they don't even speak to me 'cause I'm an Engineer.
</div>

<div class="censor">
:Fornication, Copulation, Penetration, Fuck
:Rim job, reem job, nose job, blow job, cunnilingus, Suck
:Eating beaver, dipping wick, taking it up the rear;
:These words don't mean a thing to me cause I'm an engineer!
</div>

== Verses about fictional engineers ==
:Said Spock to Captain Kirk "the logic you cannot refute,
:the odds of our survival are so small I can't compute."
:Said Kirk "Oh no! We all shall die!" but then he gave a cheer,
:For he just remembered Scotty was the resident engineer!

== Verses about history and mythology ==
:Sir Francis Drake and all his men set out for Calais Bay,
:They'd heard the Spanish Rum fleet was headed up that way.
:But the Engineers had beat them by a night and half a day,
:And though as drunk as they could be, you still could hear them say...

:Caesar went to Egypt at the age of fifty-three,
:Cleopatra's blood was warm, her heart was young and free.
:And every night when Julius said goodnight at three o'clock,
:A Roman Engineer was waiting just around the block.

:Rapunzel let her hair down for two suitors down below,
:So one of them could grab a hold and give the old heave-ho.
:The prince began to climb at once, but soon came out the worst,
:For the Engineer rode up a lift and reached Rapunzel first.

:Elvis was a legend, he's the King of Rock & Roll,
:But the life he was leading, well it finally took its toll,
:He realized too late that he choose the wrong career,
:So he faked his death, and came to Skule™ to become an Engineer.

== New Verses from Godiva Hymn Contest (2015) ==
:I came across a girl whose skin was glazed in purple hue,
:Her aura proud, her spirit loud, her words were strong and true;
:She led a group of hundreds who were chanting far and near,
:And in my mind, I had no doubt - she led the engineers!

== New Verse from Godiva Hymn Contest (2017) ==
:At frosh week does it all begin, with cheers and purple dye
:And then before we know it we’ve returned from PEY
:We made it through the many years with blood and sweat and tears
:Though time may pass we shan’t forget - I am an engineer!

== Closing verse (traditional) ==
:Now you've heard our story and you know we're Engineers,
:We love to hate our problem sets, we love to drink our beers.
:We drink to every person who comes here from far and near,
:'Cause we're a HELL-OF-A, HELL-OF-A, HELL-OF -A, HELL-OF-A, HELL-OF-AN-ENGINEER!!!

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Godiva's Hymn